By Joan Vanderlaan, BSN, MN
I recently attended an equestrian clinic that helps people build a partnership between horse and rider to help them develop mental, emotional, and physical fitness together. When both parties achieve these elements, learning can happen. An important part of the process is not asking horse or rider to do anything for which they are not yet mentally, emotionally, or physically ready. It really struck me how much the process is like educating children.
As the summer progresses and thoughts go to the upcoming school year, what are the elements of mental, emotional, and physical fitness that adults should be thinking about as we look toward September. Are our children mentally, emotionally, and physically ready for their learning environment? Is the school in tune with the mental, emotional, and physical capabilities of our children at their current age and stage of development? Are the adults in the lives of the child equally ready — mentally, emotionally, and physically, to support the partnership of learning for the child?
As a system, schools have the mental and physical readiness parts of education down. For example, we don’t ask 5 year olds to navigate a large building unassisted and change rooms/teachers because of the ringing of a bell – they aren’t mentally ready.
But how are we addressing the emotional fitness of our children? There are many holistic models of wellness that address multiple aspects of a child’s environment. Are they consistently eating nutritionally balanced and portion appropriate meals? Are they getting sufficient amounts of sleep? Do they engage in physical activity on a regular/recurring basis? Do they have an age appropriate understanding of stress and a realistic stress reduction plan? If they display signs of emotional distress, possibly severe enough to warrant medical attention, do we address it just as we would a sore throat or broken bone? These are all important questions to ask about our children’s educational environment.
What about children who struggle emotionally?
The stigma against seeking mental health care exists in all segments of society, in all ages. According to the US Department of Health & Human Services, the Affordable Care Act expands mental health and substance use disorder benefits for 62 million Americans. That may or may not work towards removing the stigma, but at least it gives families affordable options.
Even when parents seek mental health care for their children, they may struggle with revealing that information to schools. In elementary school, my son experienced the death his 10-year-old cousin and 70-year-old grandfather to cancer, and we moved cross country for military reassignment. When he struggled to deal with these major life events, his pediatrician recommended counseling and my husband and I agreed. Great – problem solved, or so we thought.
Actually, the counseling did help him deal with his emotional distress. But I had to deal with whether I would “reveal” his professional counseling to his school. The one place where I was tempted to “hide” the information was on a week-long overnight YMCA camp application. I didn’t want them to treat him differently because we got the right help. It wasn’t an ongoing problem, he wasn’t on medication – what business was it of theirs? In the end, I did check yes, but gave a written explanation that it was for grief and change counseling. So, even as an educated health professional, I was reluctant to reveal my child’s utilization of health benefits that clearly helped him during a rough patch in his life.
As caring adults, we must talk openly and often about overcoming bias, prejudice, and potentially lost opportunities when children are denied necessary and beneficial diagnosis and treatment of behavioral health concerns. None of us wants our child spending all day with a teacher or other students with untreated behavioral/emotional health needs. Nor should we deny our child appropriate treatment for behavioral/emotional health needs. I hope all the children in your life are mentally, emotionally, and physically ready to learn. If not, please ask yourself how you can improve their readiness for the partnership of learning.
Joan Vanderlaan, BSN, MN served 30 years on active duty in the Army Nurse Corps. In retirement, she works for the Military Child Education Coalition and works at developing partnerships with her horses.
