An Army Career, A VA Career, and PTSD

By Christine Leccese

As the person who had to describe in detail what happened to soldiers killed in the Vietnam War, and ensure that body bags contained the appropriate contents, Roger “Ted” Theodore had seen his fair share of trauma in Vietnam. However, he didn’t know the trauma that awaited him as he continued his Army service working in casualties offices, and then retiring and embarking on a career in the VA helping veterans, many of whom had seen combat, access their benefits.

His Early Career

In 1966, when 19-year-old Theodore was working at a paper manufacturing plant in Middletown, Ohio, he was drafted into the Vietnam War. First he was sent to Korea, then stateside, and finally off to Vietnam with the 101^st Airborne. Because he had typing experience, the Army put him to work in a casualty division typing up reports and sending them back to the Army. When there was a big battle with a lot of casualties, one of the casualty workers had to physically go out to the site of the battle. “We had to make sure that everything went with that body and the bodybag – personnel records, witness statements, dog tags,” Theodore says.

Theodore was the first casualty officer to arrive at the infamous  Vietnam War battle of Hamburger Hill while it was still raging.  While processing casualties, he came across his best friend who had been killed. This was extremely difficult, but Theodore had a job to do and had to keep working. He tried to put it in the back of his head and not think about it, but the memory still haunts him today.

Back in the U.S., Still in Casualties

When Theodore returned stateside, he worked at Fort Benning for the Department of the Army processing casualty reports. He worked with chaplains, survival assistance officers, and families to help survivors with their grief, benefits, and pay. Between working in casualties in war and at home, he had seen his fair share of trauma, but didn’t think it was impacting his own mental health.

It is only today, through the benefit of time, that Theodore realizes that these experiences gave him posttraumatic stress and panic attacks. “I always had anger issues after Vietnam. I turned into an alcoholic and I’m on my fourth marriage,” Theodore says. “I could never get close to anyone, and to this day, my only close friends are other Vietnam vets.”

After Retirement: A Career With the VA

After retiring from the Army, Theodore went to work for the VA in different locations and at the Nashville VA held a position in which, among other duties, he explained VA benefits to widows and children of fallen soldiers. “That job affected me a lot. After each meeting, I had to leave the office because I was physically ill,” he says.

His supervisor at the time suggested he get tested for PTSD for his anger issues. Theodore brushed off the suggestion saying he didn’t believe in the condition. “In the Army they teach you to be tough and not complain. That message was bred into me for 20 years,” Theodore says.

However, the stress of his own experiences in war, and hearing from people whose trauma was newer worked together and caught up with him. Anger, alcohol, and broken relationships were part of his life and the cost of all he had experienced. One day, Theodore lost his temper over the news that a very injured soldier had been retired without full benefits. He threw a file at his supervisor, who was a good friend. He was disciplined for the act, but more importantly, he realized that he needed to seek help for himself instead of focusing on helping others.

Finally, A Diagnosis

Theodore was diagnosed with PTSD and got soon got treatment. Although he still has nightmares, panic attacks and the occasional flashback, he is much better today and is active in the Lazarus/SAFE project, which is an organization in Clarksville, Tenn., that helps service members, veterans and their families get counseling and access services, among other activities.

“I encourage any service member to check his or her own mental health,” Theodore says. “Sometimes, anger and drinking a lot can be a sign of something bigger. I still struggle with the aftermath of serving in a war, but I am in much better shape because I recognized and treated my PTSD and alcohol problem.”

Christine Leccese is the communications and marketing manager at Military Pathways.